Last week

I had an awesome week last week........awesome in that I feel different this week to what I did last week this time.

It began with an emotional and tiring weekend  - tiring having Maxine's friend around, and emotional sneaking bits of time to hastily look at the family pictures that had arrived on the Friday, and having lots of emotion come out of that.

It was also emotional because I had to fetch Maxine early from football practise because she was in floods of tears and wanted them to call me, which they did. I couldn't figure it out at the time, and thought she was just having a bad day....last Friday I found out that an older boy had thrown her football boot over the fence during practice, and I think it would have been that that pushed Maxine over the edge the previous week. Maxine's not one to talk about stuff like that, though, and unfortunately, no mother in the world can protect their children from stuff like that happening either!

On Thursday we went to look at potential schools for Maxine, taking along Maxine's Learning Support Assistant from school, because she knows Maxine best within a school environment. The first school was as we remembered it from the last time....still cold and 'institutional'....definitely not the place for Maxine. The second school, however, was a breath of fresh air, and it did feel like 'the one'.

There is a big BUT in that Maxine was back-classed after her first year at school as it was felt she would fit in better socially with the year group below her, than her regular peer group. It is a decision we still stand by as being one of the best made for Maxine, and has enabled her to 'fit in' with her regular class mates ever since. Now, though, it would seem that this very decision is coming back to bite us....and as yet we don't know where we stand, or if we have a chance to fight it.

If Maxine stays in mainstream school, she could remain back-classed, but the level of support drops off sharply in secondary school and there is a huge question mark that such a placement would be suitable for Maxine, given her current academic level.

But, on the other hand, special schools are structured around age groups, so the only options we are currently being given is that she would have to go from Year 5 to Year 7 next year (if she moves next September), or Year 6 to Year 8 if we want her to finish primary school as we had originally planned.

It makes no sense to us as parents that a child who was deemed to be exceptionally immature in Reception, and is still noted as having social skills far below her peers (in the lower class she currently is in!) is now expected to jump up and miss a year?!!! Just because 'that's the way it is'.

And, right now, I don't know if we are able to fight this.....so, more on this to follow.....

My week was finished off with me going to a re-union of sorts. I had always sworn I would never go to a re-union because I hated high school, and was only too pleased to leave Pietermaritzburg. I was the only one from my school to go to university in Durban, and not Pietermaritburg, like everyone else.
There were 11 of us in total, a couple of whom I went to both primary and high school with, and a couple I recognised by name or face, but didn't know them from school at all.

And I have to say, I am SO pleased I went. It wasn't embarrassing or awkward, it was lovely. To see us all now...just normal people, with our families, all talking about our kids and our experiences and how we got here. And Maxine and Trev popped in so that Maxine could meet my old school friends, and I was so proud of my little girl. I could tell they could see that she is 'different' and it didn't matter at all.

I'm not the person I was at school, and it wasn't school I hated, I was just trying to survive and cope with it all, and I did......and it struck me suddenly that I'm more than just 'okay', and it's a pretty good feeling.